What to do when you find out you have cancer?

Being told you have cancer is one of the most stressful experiences anyone can face, especially after days or weeks of waiting for answers. As soon as you hear the diagnosis, your mind may fill with questions, but most of them come down to one thing: what do I do now?

Trying to understand your diagnosis and make sense of the treatment ahead can feel overwhelming. It is normal to experience a range of difficult emotions, but having a clearer idea of what to expect can help you feel more in control during a challenging time.

In this guide, we will look at what to do in the days and weeks after your diagnosis, the support available to you and how a live-in carer could help you manage day to day life with dignity and comfort.

What happens after you get your cancer diagnosis?

Once you get the phone call from your doctor explaining your diagnosis, you’ll be offered an appointment with a cancer doctor or specialist nurse. The appointment may be offered within the coming days or weeks, depending on the type of cancer you have and its severity.

During this appointment, you’ll be able to ask plenty of questions and find out more about your treatment plan. Your healthcare specialist will provide advice and support you in making informed decisions about your treatment, ensuring you have all the necessary information.

Here are some common questions you may want to ask your doctor:

• Treatment options:
  • What treatments do you recommend for me?
  • What’s the aim of my treatment?
  • What are the benefits and risks of each treatment? Are there side effects?
  • Would there be different treatment options if I were treated privately?
  • Are there clinical trials I would be a good fit for?
• Choosing whether to have treatment or not:
  • How can I choose between the treatments offered to me?
  • Can I get a second opinion?
  • Can I change my mind after treatment has begun?
  • If I decline treatment, what’s likely to happen?
  • If I decline treatment, could I have it at a later date?
• What your treatment is likely to involve:
  • How soon can I begin treatment?
  • How long will this specific treatment last?
  • How long will I be in hospital for, and what’s the timeframe for recovery?
• How treatment will likely affect you:
  • What do the different types of treatment I’m being offered do?
  • Do I need to change my lifestyle while having treatment?
  • Can I still drive?
  • Will I have to change my diet or stop drinking alcohol?
  • Can I still exercise?
  • Will treatment affect my sex life or fertility?
  • Can I continue working alongside treatment?
  • Do I need to avoid any specific groups of people while undergoing treatment?
• How treatment is working:
  • How effective is treatment likely to be?
  • How will I and the doctors know if a treatment plan is working?
  • Will I need to have more tests?
• During treatment:
  • Who will be looking after me while I undergo treatment?
  • Who should I contact if I’m having problems or side effects between appointments?
  • When will I next talk to my oncologist or specialist nurse?
• After treatment:
  • What can I expect after treatment finishes?
  • How can I expect to feel after treatment?
  • How long might it take for me to feel like my old self?
  • What are the long-term effects of my cancer and chosen treatment?
  • How can I reduce the risk of the cancer returning?

This may seem like a lot of questions – because it is. Your first appointment after diagnosis is to get all the facts about your cancer and options moving forward. We highly recommend writing the questions you want answered out beforehand and taking them to your appointment. This ensures you won’t forget anything and provides a space to take notes during the appointment, which you can refer to later when making important decisions.

Considering your treatment options

Your cancer doctor will be able to walk you through all the types of treatments available to you. It’s not uncommon for your care plan to include multiple types of treatment to get the best possible outcome. For example, you might have surgery to remove as much of the cancer as possible while undergoing chemotherapy to control its growth.

Here are the most common potential cancer treatments available:

Surgery

Surgery is one of the most common treatment options, especially if your cancer seems to be contained in one area of the body. A surgeon will remove some or all of the cancerous cells. You may also have surgery to fix problems caused by the cancer, such as a blockage in the intestine caused by a tumour.

Surgery is offered if your doctor thinks they can remove most of the cancer, or if it’s a quick way of managing the spread of the disease. If surgery is offered to you, ask your doctor to confirm the goal so you’re both on the same page.

Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy uses strong medications that kill cancer cells. It’s effective and used for many types of cancer, but chemo isn’t suitable for everyone. It’s also used for many different goals, not just as a cure.

If your doctor recommends chemotherapy, it might be to:

• Cure your cancer without it coming back
• Shrink your tumour to stop it growing and spreading
• Reduce symptoms
• Shrink a tumour before surgery to make it easier to remove
• Lower the risk of cancer returning after surgery or radiation therapy

Chemotherapy can have harsh side effects that take a toll on the body. For this reason, some doctors may not recommend it for people who are likely to struggle with its impact, especially if it would lower their quality of life. If the risks are greater than the benefits, it may be helpful to explore other treatment options.

Radiation therapy

Radiation therapy uses powerful beams of energy to damage cancer cells and stop them from growing or changing. There are several ways it can be given:

• Internally: A radioactive source is placed within your body near the tumour, destroying it from the inside out.
• Externally: A machine sends powerful rays of radiation into the tumour from outside your body.
• Systematically: Radioactive medicines are placed into your veins or given through the mouth, which then travel through the bloodstream to find cancer cells.

Radiation therapy is a strong treatment that can cause several side effects. Ask your care team what type of radiation you’re getting, how it might affect your body and any safety precautions you may need beforehand.

Targeted medicine therapy

Targeted medicines do exactly what the name suggests: they find and attack specific parts of the cancer cells. This therapy is different to chemo, as instead of attacking any cells that get in its way (which may leave healthy cells negatively impacted), targeted medicines can usually attack only the bad cells while leaving the others untouched.

There is reason to believe that targeted medicines result in fewer side effects, but ask your doctor for more information on the differences between this treatment and chemotherapy.

Immunotherapy

Immunotherapy utilises your body’s natural processes to help treat your cancer. Some immunotherapy drugs make your immune system work harder so it can find the cancerous cells and prevent them from growing, while others change how your immune system works to better attack the diseased cells.

Hormone therapy

Certain cancers require hormones within your body to grow and spread, so blocking the effects of these hormones might help slow down the progression of your cancer. Hormone therapy does exactly this. The most common cancers to be treated with hormone therapy are breast and prostate cancer, usually alongside other treatment options.

Clinical trials

Clinical trials are conducted by researchers hoping to test new treatments on active cancer cells. Many cancer clinical trials test new treatments compared to standard alternatives. You might like to learn about clinical trials if there are limited standard treatments currently available to you, especially if your cancer is rare or particularly difficult to locate and treat.

Coping with a cancer diagnosis

Deciding on treatment and coming to terms with your diagnosis is often only half the battle: you also need to find a coping strategy that works for you. Experiencing physical and emotional changes that impact the way you live is common in cancer patients.

Here are some tips on how to cope with your new normal:

• Talk through your feelings: Sometimes, talking is the best medicine. Chat to your friends and family about how you’re feeling, or keep a journal if you prefer a more private method.
• Express yourself: Some people find it easier to express their feelings through music, drawing or painting. This can also help you take your mind off of life changes and treatment.
• Keep yourself healthy: Find a physical activity you enjoy, as long as you’re feeling up to it. Low-intensity exercises like walking or gardening can help lower stress and boost your mood. Why not invite a loved one to spend some quality time with you?
• Take care of yourself: Giving yourself time and grace is most important throughout this journey. Eat well, make time to do something you enjoy every day and don’t bottle your feelings up.
• Reach out for support: Many cancer patients find support in a number of different places. You might find yourself reaching out to spiritual leaders, support organisations, family members or old friendships.
• Talk to your cancer care team: Don’t worry about being a burden to your healthcare providers; talk to your care team about any concerns you have throughout your journey. Let them know how you’re coping and if you’re struggling.
• Consider counselling or support groups: There are plenty of in-person and virtual options available for both counselling and support groups. Find one that aligns with your cancer, treatment and personality to meet like-minded people going through similar things to you.

Telling your loved ones you have cancer

One of the first things you might think about after a cancer diagnosis is how and when to tell your friends and family. Talking about cancer can be difficult, especially if you are worried that your loved ones may struggle to cope with the news.

Here are some tips to help you tell those closest to you about your diagnosis:

• Talk to your loved ones as soon as you feel up to it, as the quicker you do, the quicker they can support you through the next steps.
• Explain what kind of cancer you have and the treatment plan you’re thinking of going with. Let them know if you want their opinion or not beforehand so they don’t give unsolicited advice.
• While it might not be easy, tell people closest to you how you’re feeling.
• Some may struggle with hearing about your diagnosis or not know what to say, but try not to let this upset you. Find others who are more comfortable talking through your diagnosis and feelings. Support groups are great places to find like-minded people.

Decide how you’d like others to help: would you like them to offer help with chores and emotional support, or would you rather them give you space? Write a list of things that you might need help with for your loved ones to pick from. This can help you manage your expectations and make the process of telling people slightly easier.

Considering palliative care

Palliative care focuses on improving the quality of life and relieving symptoms rather than curing your cancer. This is usually offered to people with advanced cancer, and you can choose to have it at any point after diagnosis.

Palliative care isn’t the same as end-of-life care. You may choose to have it for many years. The aim is to offer relief, support and comfort to you and your loved ones, both in and out of the hospital.

Both family and professional carers can offer palliative care, depending on how much support you need throughout each day. Palliative carers often live-in to be on-hand 24/7. Here’s what they’ll help you with:

• Managing symptoms, including pain, sickness and fatigue
• Looking after emotional and psychological needs
• Practical needs, such as future planning and specialist equipment
• Acting as a support system for you and your family

How Country Cousins can help

Being given a cancer diagnosis can turn your life upside down. Country Cousins wants to help every step of the way, managing symptoms from your own home to keep you comfortable and confident with whatever’s coming next.

Our live-in carers are fully trained and experienced in cancer support, including:

• Daily monitoring
• Assistance with showering, bathing, shaving and oral hygiene
• Support post-treatment
• Help getting around the house
• Running errands and arranging appointments
• Chores and meal prep
• Companionship and emotional support

A Country Cousins live-in carer gives you the independence and dignity to carry on life the way you want. We’ll match you with a carer experienced in cancer care who will offer warmth, discretion and exemplary service day after day.

Talk to our team today

As the UK’s longest-serving introductory live-in care agency, we have been providing compassionate live-in care to those who need it since 1959 – all from the comfort of their own homes.

Give us a call today on 01293 224 706. Our experienced team is on hand to help from Monday to Friday, 8 am to 6 pm. Alternatively, contact us through our online enquiry form.