Depression in the Elderly: Providing Support with Compassion

It’s natural to feel low from time to time, especially after a loss or during periods of change. But when sadness becomes persistent, it may be a sign of something more. Depression is a common condition in later life, yet it often goes unnoticed or misunderstood. It can affect how someone feels, thinks and manages daily life — and it’s not just a normal part of ageing.

The good news is that depression is treatable. With gentle understanding and the right support, many older adults can feel more like themselves again. Whether you’re a family member, friend or carer, knowing what to look out for and how to help can make a real difference to someone’s wellbeing.

In this guide, we’ll explore the signs of depression in older adults, how to start a conversation, and the practical steps you can take to offer meaningful support.

Understanding depression in later life

Depression is more than feeling sad for a short time. It is a medical condition that affects how a person feels, thinks and copes with everyday life. In older adults, it can develop gradually and may sometimes be overlooked or mistaken for other changes linked to ageing.

There are many reasons why someone may become depressed later in life. These can include:

Bereavement — The loss of a partner, friend or family member can leave someone feeling deeply alone and uncertain about the future.
Loneliness and isolation — Spending long periods alone or having fewer social connections can have a big impact on mood.
Long-term health conditions — Living with illness, pain or reduced mobility can affect both body and mind.
Loss of independence — Needing help with daily tasks or moving into care can lead to feelings of frustration or low self-worth.
Changes in routine or surroundings — Moving house, retiring or changes in care arrangements can feel unsettling and overwhelming.

Unlike a passing low mood, depression tends to last and often affects sleep, appetite, memory and motivation. In some cases, it may also be confused with dementia, especially when the person appears forgetful, withdrawn or confused.

Understanding the difference is important. Depression can be treated, and many older adults feel better with the right combination of support, routine and sometimes medical care.

Signs and symptoms to look out for

Recognising depression in older adults is not always straightforward. It may show up in subtle ways, and some people may not talk openly about how they feel. Knowing what to look for can help you offer support early, before things become more difficult.

Common signs of depression in later life include:

A low mood that lasts most of the day, nearly every day
Loss of interest in activities that used to bring joy
Feeling tired or lacking energy, even after rest
Changes in appetite — eating much more or much less than usual
Sleeping too much or too little
Difficulty concentrating or remembering things
Feeling hopeless, guilty or worthless
Avoiding friends, family or social events
Talking about death, feeling like a burden or not wanting to go on

It’s important to note that these symptoms may not always be shared openly. A person might not say they feel sad, but they may describe feeling “flat,” “empty” or “just not themselves.” You may also notice a change in how they manage everyday tasks or how they respond to others.

If you see several of these signs lasting for more than a couple of weeks, it may be time to gently encourage a conversation and seek professional help.

Starting a conversation

It can feel difficult to bring up concerns about someone’s mood, especially if they seem private or proud. But starting a calm, open conversation can be the first step toward getting the help they need. You don’t need to have all the answers — just showing that you care can make a big difference.

Here are some gentle ways to start the conversation:

Choose a quiet, comfortable time when you won’t be rushed
Start with something simple like “You don’t seem quite yourself lately — is everything okay?”
Focus on listening rather than trying to solve the problem straight away
Avoid minimising how they feel, even if it’s hard to understand
Let them know you’re there for them and that they’re not alone
Encourage them to speak to their GP or another trusted professional

Some people may be relieved to talk. Others may need time before they open up. Try not to push or show frustration — simply knowing that someone is nearby and willing to listen can bring comfort and reassurance.

Practical ways to provide support

Supporting someone with depression is about being patient, offering encouragement and helping them feel connected to the world around them. Small, everyday actions can have a powerful effect over time.

Here are some practical ways to help:

Encourage simple daily routines, like regular meals and short walks
Invite them to join in gentle activities, even if it is just sitting outside or listening to music
Offer help with small tasks if they feel overwhelming, such as shopping or organising appointments
Suggest social contact, such as a phone call with a friend or a visit to a local group
Make healthy meals together and gently encourage regular eating
Offer lifts to GP appointments or counselling sessions if needed
Help keep the environment calm, tidy and welcoming
Involve them in small decisions to support a sense of control and independence

While you cannot “fix” depression for someone else, your presence, patience and understanding can make their journey to recovery feel much less lonely.

When professional help is needed

Sometimes, caring support from family and friends is not enough on its own. Depression is a medical condition and often needs treatment from a health professional to improve.

You should encourage someone to seek professional help if:

Their low mood has lasted for more than a few weeks
They have lost interest in almost all daily activities
They talk about feeling hopeless or that life is not worth living
They have stopped eating properly or are sleeping very poorly
They are withdrawing from everyone around them

A GP can assess symptoms and recommend the right support. Treatment may include:

Talking therapies, such as counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy
Medication, such as antidepressants, if needed
Referral to mental health services for extra support
Social prescribing, such as joining local activities or support groups

If you believe someone may be at risk of harming themselves, it is important to seek urgent medical advice by contacting their GP, calling 111, or if needed, calling 999 in an emergency.

Professional help, combined with ongoing support from family and carers, can make a real difference in lifting someone out of depression and helping them feel more connected and hopeful.

How can Country Cousins help?

At Country Cousins, we understand that living with depression can make everyday life feel more difficult, especially in later years. Having the right support at the right time can make a real difference to how someone feels from day to day.

Our experienced live-in carers provide both practical and emotional support for older adults living with depression. They are there to offer gentle encouragement, help maintain healthy routines, and provide company and reassurance through the challenges that depression can bring.

Whether it is support with daily tasks, helping to keep appointments, encouraging social contact or simply being a kind and steady presence, our carers are carefully matched to each person’s needs. Our goal is to help every person feel safer, more connected and more confident in their own home.

Talk to our team today

If you or a loved one are exploring live-in care, speak with one of our friendly team today. They can provide expert advice and guidance on the best option for your needs.

Give us a call today on 01293 224 706. Our experienced team is on hand to help from Monday to Friday, 8 am to 6 pm. Alternatively, contact us through our online enquiry form.